Barks and Bytes: What’s a Guy to Do?
Honestly guys, it has been a crappy week for me. Ash is in heat and mommy won’t let me get near her. If you are wondering why this might be a problem, well…I am proud to sat that I’m still a man and I have my important parts. Mine haven’t been cut off like Teddy’s! I don’t know if that is such a good thing though cause all week I have felt like I’m in prison. Now normally, I would enjoy being in the house with the humans all of the time, but heck, Ash is in heat and I want some of that! So this is my daily routine…
I get up in the morning and I want out. Mommy lets me out but she hurries and puts the diaper on Ash and makes Ash come inside. That’s not fair! Now I’m outside and Ash is inside. What makes it even worse is that Teddy tries to hump me and not Ash. Why would he try to hump me and not the girl dog that is in heat? I am trying real hard to understand why this is happening!
Mommy leaves me outside with Teddy, the dog that likes to rape boy dogs, until it is time to feed us. She then hurries Ash back outside and makes me come in. All the while, Teddy is trying to hump me and I’m trying to hump Ash. It is quite a sight and mommy is yelling at all three of us to STOP! Like that is going to happen!
Then mommy feeds me in the house and Ash and Teddy get to eat out in the sunroom. I am stuck in the house all day except when mommy takes me out to potty. Mommy has gotten smart and now she takes me out front to do my business. She even takes me for little walks to try to get my mind off of Ash. Mommy has decided that it is much easier to take me out to the front yard and then she doesn’t have to try to keep Teddy from humping me and me from humping Ash.
I’m such a lonely guy right now cause my girl Ash is outside with Teddy and I don’t get to be with her. I just sit inside and watch the two of them out there. I’m very jealous. Awwwe heck, this just doesn’t seem fair. So do you know what I do to get back at mommy? I jump up on the couch with her and I lick her and I try to hump her and she gets really frustrated with me. Mommy says Ash is getting fixed as soon as possible. Poor Ash!
Don’t forget to enter our SmartFillets giveaway. They are delish and we promise your dog will love them! Just go over here and enter!
We also have that little book project going on! We have received a few stories about your dogs that you have rescued! Keep ’em coming! We plan on giving all the profits to animal shelters and rescues but we need stories to make the book. Won’t you please help and write a story! You can find out more here.
Filed under: Thursday Barks And Bytes Blog Hop
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